Why Cerulean Sanctum Has Been Quiet in 2017


Man aloneThis blog has been in operation since 2003. That’s a long time. And in that time, much has been weathered.

A select few readers know my wife has battled mental illness for going on nearly a decade now. I haven’t talked about it much here, since talking about mental illness in a public space can be something of a death sentence. People don’t understand mental illness, nor do they know what to do when someone is mentally ill, so talking about it brings raised eyebrows and that slow drift away. Stigma—it’s still out there. As is a feeling of helplessness. If it were cancer, people would know what to say and do, but with mental illness, no one shows up at the door with a casserole. The person with the illness may seem fine, but when the visitors go away or the event ends, there it is. The spouse and family see it and live with it, but few others must.

Traumatic events can destabilize someone with a mental illness. We had a series of such in late 2016, which led to much heartache and grief, and my wife’s illness flared up. We’ve been battling back ever since. Doctor changes, medicine changes, and on and on. When your spouse suffers, you suffer. This has meant scant time for side projects and pursuits. And between a son trying to get his driver’s license and thinking about college, my work, household needs, helping my wife battle back, and all the various vicissitudes of life, blogging had to take a back seat. Fact is, almost everything that was not core to daily existence had to.

It’s not that I don’t have pressing thoughts to share. It’s that sometimes, you have to choose your priorities.

Winter and spring were rough, but I hold out hope that summer will be better. Maybe that will free up time for Cerulean Sanctum. God knows I want to write, but God also knows that family matters.

Thanks for being a reader.

14 thoughts on “Why Cerulean Sanctum Has Been Quiet in 2017

  1. Dan – I have been through (and continue to go through) a similar struggle with my wife (depression & PTSD). I’m finding Jesus in the pain, but that doesn’t make it necessarily easier. Will be praying for you and your family.

  2. So very sorry to hear about your struggles. I will pray for you both. I know people hate free advice so forgive me here and be led by the Spirit- David Perlmutter is an author that might have information that could help (Grain Brain and Brain Maker in particular). He goes into cutting edge research about the connection between diet, gut and neurological disorders- depression and Alzheimer’s in particular. Just a thought. I find that stuff fascinating.

  3. Les Benedict

    Dan I’ve been blessed by your writings and thoughts. Although I have missed them I can understand caring for your wife. May God continue to bless you and we will continue to pray.

  4. Kathy G. Smith-Cancela

    Just discovered your blog today and so surprised to see we loved many of the same books. I also love the Great Evangelical Disaster by Schaefer and read everything by Lloyd-Jones along with many others you cited. So sorry to hear about your wife and I’m a caretaker also and understand your struggles. Families must be taken care of and I will keep you in my prayers.

  5. bobpinto

    So sorry. I have prayed for you. Be patient, if possible. I went through a very rough patch where no medicine would help. Am much better now and continue to improve.

    Rick Warren has spoken extensively on this since the death of his son.


    I just found your article about the World’s Best Bible Reading Plan. I too have done McCheyne (not sure I spelled that correctly). I tried several in the past and my dilemma has always been exactly what you described. I want to spend more time. I’ve been more and more convicted recently because I haven’t been spending the time in the Word I would like to yesterday prayed and asked God to show me a Bible reading plan that would more fit the way I prefer to read. Tonight I googled “Bible Reading Plans” and as I scanned down the list I am to yours. I keep forgetting to simply ask my Heavenly Father.

    I know what your family has been going through. Thank you for sharing that so we can pray. But isn’t it truly a blessing to see His provision in our time of weakness so His strength can be demonstrated. I had a recurrence of breast cancer after 13 years that manifested in a chest wall tumor. A Facebook friend encouraged me by describing what was going on as “accelerated transformation” and I like to think of it as accelerated sanctification because it can be in what most folks see as the darkest times that we experience His presence and sustaining presence and power the most.

    Finding this reading plan is truly an answer to prayer and I will put you and your family near the very top of my list as I work through it. MacArthur suggests something on this same order but in 6 verse chunks, but I really like your plan of reading it like a book and then going back to all those portions looking for specific things and seeing the themes and ultimately truly knowing the book and by doing so giving the Holy Spirit time to do His individual work in our lives.

    Thanks, again, and God bless!

  7. Clint

    This summer marked 20 years of struggling with depression. Mentioning it to others, even Christians, has often been the death knell to having a meaningful friendship. I know what my wife has had to endure, so I’m very sorry, brother. Your labor is not in vain. May God sustain you.

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