On Disappointment

I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD
In the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD;
Be strong and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for the LORD.
—Psalms 27:13-14 NASB

Disappointed
— 36,600,000 occurrences on Google

Disappointment is always lurking. Due to astonishing similarities to an existing series of books by a bestselling novelist (who was a complete unknown to me just a few weeks ago), my novel and the series that I hoped would spring from it may be dead. At the advice of another author who was familiar with that other novelist's recently published trilogy, Faceplant I read those books. Having finished them this last Sunday, I sit here now and wonder how it is possible.

It wasn't too long ago that I landed my dream job at Apple Computer bashing Windows and the PCs that ran it. Newly married, I was on top of the world. We moved cross-country, thrilling to the hope held out before us. However, less than six months later my department was disbanded and we were stuck in Silicon Valley, a place where "it's all about who you know," without knowing anyone.

My mother was a "mom's Mom" in every sense of the word. And though she worked with young children every day, she had no grandchildren. How excited we were to learn of our pregnancy just days before we flew back to Cincinnati to stay with my folks for Christmas. There was even talk of moving back to be near the soon-to-be grandparents. Two months later, Mom was diagnosed with brain cancer. We moved back to Cincinnati, and I was fortunate to find a great job. My Dad died a couple weeks before the Christmas that followed the joyous one just a year before; Mom followed just over three months later. My exciting new company started having money trouble in the wake of the looming Internet bust and the layoffs came. My wife kept her good job, but we had a new baby and Dad's estate was troubling, so I stayed home to try to solve all the issues of losing both parents in rapid succession. We moved into our first home just a few months later—and then my wife was laid off, too. New house, new child, no parents, no income.

And so it goes.

In the last ten years I've stared in the face of more disappointments than I can remember. After a while you take a look at your list of goals in life and ask, "What was I thinking?" And while that's not the commonly accepted Christian response to goal-setting—at least from what all the bestsellers on the Christian bookstore shelves say—it may be closer to the truth than some wish to admit.

When the Tower of Siloam fell on eighteen hapless residents of long-ago Palestine, Jesus wasn't trapped by the question of the source for their rotten sense of timing and luck, He simply said, "…unless you repent, you will all likewise perish." He had a much different perspective, didn't He?

For centuries people have made the Bible into a talisman for good fortune. Entire theologies are woven around what God is mandated to give us if we apply the right alchemy of verses to our woeful situations. Yet who claims to force the hand of the Almighty? Who is that prideful? Well, Lucifer comes to mind….

What no one asks is if it's okay to pray what David prayed in Psalm 27. He said, "Lord, without the assurance of goodness provided to me in the here and now, I'm ruined!" God never intended for us to go through life without goodness evident this side of Heaven.

Now this is not prosperity thinking. You won't see any links to Rod Parsley on Cerulean Sanctum. But isn't the status quo, either.

I believe that we as a Church need a readjustment. Our idea of goodness is possessing every glossy item featured in the latest Neiman-Marcus catalog, plus a few from Family Christian Stores. We've let America infest our idea of what is good. In many ways, we've traded in a few of our "worldly" trinkets for "approved and redeemed Christian" versions. (A step down if you ask me.)

When we die in real life, what do we take with us? Nothing. But what about when we die at the foot of the cross? The answer's the same. Yet the problem with so many of us American Christians is we aren't fully ready to leave it all at the foot of the cross. And since we aren't, we never fully appreciate what the Father gives us in exchange for all the junk we lug around.

And what does the Father give us at the cross? Jesus.

Folks, do we want Him? Or will we cling to what is ephemeral, what is gone with one pink slip, heart attack, fire, or theft.

The goodness David waited upon, the anchor to goodness that held him, was the Lord Himself. There is no disappointment in the Father for in His right hand are pleasures forever (Psalm 16:11.) And we know who sits in that strong right hand.

When we know Jesus Christ and are known by Him, how can we be disappointed?

A hymn says it all:

I'd rather have Jesus than silver or gold;
I'd rather be His than have riches untold;
I'd rather have Jesus than houses or lands;
I'd rather be led by His nail-pierced hand
Than to be the king of a vast domain,
Or be held in sin's dread sway;
I'd rather have Jesus than anything This world affords today.
I'd rather have Jesus than men's applause;
I'd rather be faithful to His dear cause;
I'd rather have Jesus than worldwide fame;
I'd rather be true to His holy name
He's fairer than lilies of rarest bloom;
He's sweeter than honey from out the comb;
He's all that my hungering spirit needs;
I'd rather have Jesus and let Him lead

Beloved, never be disapponted that Jesus is all you ultimately have.

Christian Blogging: A Waste of Time?

Future blogger? Everyone and his dog has a blog now. If there were eight million blogs a few months ago, it’s surely ten million today. The Truman Show didn’t overtake us while we were sleeping. No, we volunteered to be on it.

But is there a point to all this blogging?

My incendiary question for this week is this: If Christian blogging isn’t advancing the cause of Christ, aren’t we just wasting time?

I started Cerulean Sanctum in 2003 because I saw that there was a vacuum in the blogosphere for people who were looking for the reality of the 1st century Church in 21st century America. I’ve always looked at this blog as a ministry. There weren’t any blogs talking about Christian living and whether the Church we have today is the Church God means for us to be, and I rectified that a tiny bit.

Much has changed in the last few years since this blog’s inception, though. From my perspective, a quick perusal of the Christian blogosphere makes me wonder if anyone is really becoming a better Christian because of what is bandied about on blogs. If anything, the rapid increase in the number of blogs has resulted in a “ditto” mentality, where blog readers eventually turn their reading away from the blogs they disagree with and toward those to which they can shout a hearty “Amen!” It’s becoming one big choir preach-in.

I’ve noticed a change in comments because of this. More and more the comments sections of Christian blogs aren’t filled with dissenters, but the people who always agree with whatever is posted. (While I realize I did get many dissenting comments on my Myths of Homeschooling series, I suspect that this is more the exception—because of the incendiary topic and its relative newness in the scope of the last fifty years—than the rule.) Truthfully, I wonder how that helps anyone.

Blogs started out as online daily diaries, and I guess there’s still a case that can be made for that purpose, but honestly, I don’t read genuine online diaries. Pictures of someone else’s cat and said feline’s litterbox adventures won’t hold most people. Some blogs serve as news sites, too, but don’t people tend to read news sites that cater to their own preconceptions rather than sites that conflict? If we hang out at blogs with views in conflict with ours, aren’t we merely looking to pick a fight most of the time? We aren’t there to come around to that differing way of thinking, are we?

More and more book review and info blogs are cropping up daily; I read some of them. But I can say with all confidence that there’s not a book review blog existing today that will give a positive review to both a John MacArthur book and one from Watchman Nee. Doesn’t that bother any of us even a little bit? You’ll get plenty of awesome Spurgeon material from Phil Johnson at Pyromaniac, but you’ll never see a thing from Phil covering Spurgeon’s more charismatic contemporary, Andrew Murray. The comfort zone exists and most readers are cool with it, but don’t you ever wish that some blogger would bust out—just once? Christian ghettoes are a sad reality, and while each one will label themselves “The Remnant,” do people ever walk up to the second floor of the house that is their own self—a la that old tract, “My Heart, Christ’s Home“—and open the door to that room they’ve never explored just to peek at what’s inside? If we don’t break out of our spiritual comfort zones from time to time, how do we ever grow in Christ?

Any Arminians who have become Calvinists after stumbling across one of the many Calvinist blogs out there? Anyone? Has a blog changed anyone’s mind on any topic related to faith? Please correct me if I’m wrong, but for the clashes that occur on blogs, don’t the combatants eventually retreat to their own corners, completely set in their monolithic ways?

As for the Great Commission, I suspect the unsaved aren’t reading our Christian blogs, so we’re not really doing evangelism. Are we making disciples? I can’t tell. Again, a blog would need to toss grenades into established thinking in order for growth to occur, and I see fewer dissenters hanging out at most blogs. They’re frequenting blogs that tickle their ear itch. I mean that as no indictment of blog readers, but as a fact of human nature. Still, what can be expected from that conformity?

If these contentions are true, then what is accomplished by Christians blogging?

From my perspective, if any measurable good comes out of the Christian blogosphere it’s that bloggers occasionally meet face-to-face with other bloggers. Blogging may be a substitute networking and relationship-building tool for some. I have no problem with that. Recently, I broke bread with megablogger Jared Wilson of The Thinklings, Mysterium Tremendum, and Shizuka Blog, plus Robin Lee Hatcher of Write Thinking, Katy Raymond of Fallible, and a host of folks who hang out at Faith*in*Fiction (and most of them have blogs, too.) I would love to meet Tim Challies, La Shawn Barber, Matt of The Gad(d)about, Bob over at Gratitude & Hoopla, Diane at Crossroads, Milton at Transforming Sermons, Seymour at The Light Is Sweet, Lars of Brandywine Books, and a whole host of others, including all the fine people who comment here at Cerulean Sanctum and the other blogs I frequent. Truly, I’d get more from those personal meetings than anything else. If not for the cost and the distance, I’d be front row and center at GodBlogCon for no other reason than to hang with other likeminded bloggers.

That said, though, is our blogging only a way to make friends? Are bloggers blogging because they’re lonely, in need of support, or feel like no one is listening to them otherwise? I’m not sure most bloggers would contend that relationship-building is the primary reason they blog.

So what is the point? And if there is no point, then why are we blogging?

Just How Hard Is It to Be Saved?

About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them, and suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the foundations of the prison were shaken. And immediately all the doors were opened, and everyone’s bonds were unfastened. When the jailer woke and saw that the prison doors were open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself, supposing that the prisoners had escaped. But Paul cried with a loud voice, “Do not harm yourself, for we are all here.” And the jailer called for lights and rushed in, and trembling with fear he fell down before Paul and Silas. Then he brought them out and said, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” And they said, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.” And they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all who were in his house. And he took them the same hour of the night and washed their wounds; and he was baptized at once, he and all his family. Then he brought them up into his house and set food before them. And he rejoiced along with his entire household that he had believed in God.
—Acts 16:25-34 ESV
…if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved. For the Scripture says, “Everyone who believes in him will not be put to shame.”
—Romans 10:9-11 ESV
No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him. And I will raise him up on the last day.
—John 6:44 ESV
Therefore I want you to understand that no one speaking in the Spirit of God ever says “Jesus is accursed!” and no one can say “Jesus is Lord” except in the Holy Spirit.
—1 Corinthians 12:3 ESV

I like to follow trends in the Church and in the Christian blogosphere. One trend that is gaining power attempts to tell who’s in and who’s out by questioning if some people who think they’re saved really aren’t. Jesus Saves barn Any consistent readers of Cerulean Sanctum will know that on more than one occasion I’ve quoted Leonard Ravenhill asking if only 2% of professed Christians are truly born again. So even here there’s been some of that same rhetoric.

John Piper has a new book out called God Is the Gospel and it’s stirring up controversy about this very topic of how one is saved. Over at Old Truth, there was a post about decisional regeneration that adds fuel to the fire.

The debates about who’s in and who’s out rage, but I have to wonder if we are making it too hard. Look at the four verses posted above, for instance.

In the case of the jailer, look how simple his conversion was. Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you’ll be saved. Did the Lord draw him? Yes, in the middle of despair, the Holy Spirit was drawing him. Did Paul ask anything of him other than to believe? Not that’s listed here. Nor does Luke list anything different said by Paul than what the apostle himself outlines in the Romans passage above.

We can try to second-guess God on this, piling up other requirements, but isn’t that adding to the Gospel? If someone confesses with their mouth that Jesus Christ is Lord, why is there reason to believe that God has not drawn that person?

My confession is that I’m a Lordship salvation person. Have been for a long time. But that puts me in the company of others who make coming to Jesus a real trial.

Perhaps the problem here is one of theological systems.

The Calvinist position is hard to hold because persistence of the saints becomes a problem. What do you do with people who profess Christ then seemingly fall away. The out for Calvinists is saying that those people never really were drawn by God in the first place and therefore never made a true profession of faith. But do the Scriptures above, when taken together, paint that picture? It sure doesn’t seem so. It certainly appears that someone can be drawn of God, confess Christ with their lips and believe in their heart and still have the possibility there for falling away. Saying they were never a Christian in the first place seems like a lazy out.

Those against decisional regeneration are confronted with the fact that the jailer responded not because he was confronted with the full measure of the Gospel, but because he was in despair. He was ready to be saved without hearing a full Gospel presentation. He didn’t say to Paul, “I’m a sinner under full conviction of the Spirit as He’s brought me to the foot of the cross!” His rationale was that his boss was going to kill him OR he was astonished at the miracle earthquake that made it possible for the apostles to leave. I know plenty of people who became Christians at a remarkably low point in their lives or because they were confronted with a miracle. Is their salvation null and void? Can God not use situations to draw people? Do the passages above say that?

A Lordship salvation person, like me, struggles for a couple reasons. One is that I’m forced into an Arminian position, even though I don’t want to ascribe to it, simply because I have to struggle with the same issue as the Calvinists: what to do with people who fall away. The other is that the verses above do not say anything about the actual living out of the Lordship of Christ in one’s life. It’s assumed, obviously, but the question must be asked then if the process of Lordship begins at conversion and progresses, or is completely in place at conversion. The former makes salvation progressive while the latter makes it instantaneous. A quandary, obviously.

I could go into great deal about how all the other views on this struggle, but that doesn’t provide a solution to the original question: are we adding too many qualifiers to a person’s coming to Christ?

I would truly like to hear what other people think about this. Just how hard is it to be saved?