Hidden Messages of American Christianity: The Outstretched Hand

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This is the seventh (and last) in a series of posts covering the hidden messages that sneak into American churches' proclamation of the Gospel. For more background, please refer to this post.

Though today's post addresses what is a hidden message, I don't have any answers for it. I'm throwing it out there because I hear it all the time. I'm hoping that you readers have more insights than I do. (I'm also going to ask readers to bear with me because I sense this post is going to ramble excessively.)

It's one of the most prevalent excuses I encounter in my area of the country for people not attending church. Men who avoid church like the plague cite it more than any other issue for their lack of attendance, Offering platefrom what I've personally heard. The older the commenter gets, the more likely this issue sticks in his craw.

It's money.

No, I'm not talking about folks who are ticked off that the church is preaching budgeting instead of preaching Christ, it's their complaining about the church asking for money. It's as if no other message can get through once the offering plate is passed. The "There they go again shilling for money!" lament is raised and the sermon message is now permitted to go in one ear and out the other.

"Always with the money thing! Why do they need so much money, Martha? The pastor makes twice what I do and I caught a whiff of Chanel No. 5 on his wife when I walked past. How much does that stuff cost? A thousand dollars an ounce? And he's asking for money? How low can you get?"

Now I'm not naive enough to think that the majority of these grumblers aren't using money as an excuse to sleep in on Sunday or to justify their rejection of Christ. But why do I hear this complaint so often if it didn't carry some actual weight?

At one point in my life I attended a well-known Presbyterian church in the toniest suburb in Pittsburgh. The corporate elite of Pittsburgh occupied the pews every Sunday. It had a chauffeur's entrance. The choir (paid) consisted of the leads of the city opera. When industrial meltdowns and financial strife rocked the area in the mid-Eighties, this church was targeted by activists and their Sunday services disrupted for no other reason than wealth. The church I left last year was suburban, middle to upper-class, and rarely asked for money. The pastor had a hard time bringing up the issue. As a result, this huge church was always encountering one cash flow problem after another. My present church is more rural ("penturbian," if you want the exact, trendy word), is lower to middle-class, has a mini-sermon about tithing shared by one of the elders every Sunday, and seems to do a reputable job staying in the black. Not only that, but every time there is a need over and above the regular giving, people always come through with an amount that surprises me.

I'd love to draw some kind of conclusion about these three churches, but there are too many variables. One never asked for money because it was loaded. One rarely asked for money, should have had it in abundance anyway, but didn't. One talks about money every Sunday, doesn't seem to want for it, plus it always has reserves. No matter the case, money plays into every aspect of how each of those three churches operate. That's true with every church, every ministry. But is there a way to downplay the whole issue of money so that those who complain that churches are only out for money have no more ammo for their assault?

It's Christmastime, so we're now under bombardment by Project Angeltree, Chuck Colson's organization. We donated money to them a few years ago to send the kids of prisoners to summer camp. Christian camping being near and dear to my heart, I couldn't say no when my wife suggested it, even though it violated our decision to only give to charities run by people we personally knew. Starting in September, I swear we get letters from Angeltree every week, plus scores of e-mails.

I'm not the type to complain that Christians are always asking for money, but the sheer volume of mail we get from Angeltree makes me uncomfortable. Whatever we gave a few years ago has been more than eaten up from the cost of their mailings to us.

So I can understand how some people have a problem with Christians asking for money. This isn't to say that money is not needed, but the sheer amount of money that some churches and ministries burn through is incredible. To sustain whatever they're doing, more and more money is solicited. But is this hidden message that churches and parachurch organizations are always on the lookout for cash really a message we want to send, even if it is not entirely true in every situation?

Now I can't speak for parachurch organizations, but I wonder if the way we do church today relies too much on money. I think our buildings are too expensive, not only to build, but to maintain. I don't see in Acts that the early Church spent their money on buildings. Nor was there much in the way of expensive programs and church initiatives. Benevolences were turned around and filtered back to the neediest in the community of believers in the early Church, yet the way we collect church monies today often leaves the givers in the dark as to where their money went. And too often, overhead consumes the majority of money rather than benevolences. Shouldn't we be asking if we're handling money for the Kingdom in the best way possible?

Shouldn't that advise the way our churches are structured and operated? What if a church met in homes rather than an expensive church building? What if the pastoral staff went unpaid (or partially compensated), but was large enough so that one person didn't carry the whole ministry load, each staff member living the life of a genuine "tentmaker"? What if we went beyond tithing and set everything we caretake for the Lord on the table so that anything needed was available to anyone at any time for his or her need? What if the Church functioned to unite giver and receiver personally, rather than having our monies go into an ethereal pool of funds? What if our newfound financial reliance on each other allowed us to step out of the rat race? What if churches didn't ask for money at all?

Most of all, what if the Church handled money so uniquely that it took away any objections by those who believe that Christianity is all about the Benjamins?

I know that Americans are funny about money, but I still hold out hope that one day our churches will look different because we've found a better way to handle it. The house churches in China are destitute compared with the Communist-approved state churches, but somehow they keep growing, effectively making disciples in a way we in America long ago forgot. While there are many mitigating factors in that growth in Chinese house churches, I've got to believe that our attitudes toward money in the American Church are partly to blame for our lack of effectiveness. We've built some fancy churches and installed some expensive programming, but what do we have to show for it?

Is it possible that something better could arise in the American Church if all our money disappeared some day? Maybe if it did, the lost might be able to look beyond the our hidden message of money and to the true heart of the Gospel.

Insights into This Blog

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There have been a few bloggers who have noticed that the tenor of the Godblogosphere has turned more cannibalistic in recent months. Christian bloggers increasingly savage other Christian bloggers, the tone of posts is more critical, and everyone's trying to play "King of the Mountain" on doctrinal issues.

Yes, I see it too.

While I may blog about doctrine from time to time, Cerulean Sanctum exists to call the Church back to its roots in Acts, so my focus here is praxis. The practical living out of what we believe is what this blog is about—the Church in action. Sure, I talk about writing, personal issues, homeschooling, and a few other topics, but primarily I look at how the American Church walks its talk.

So yes, this site can be critical of the Western Church. My writing style is also very much no holds barred for those who can cope with it. What I hope distinguishes this site from others is that I almost always try to talk about solutions. It does nothing to build the Church if we talk about what's wrong with it without also discussing how we can fix what's broken. If I served as nothing more than a critic, with no solutions or help, then the Church is not bettered, nor are the people in it challenged to improve the practice of the Faith.

Many of the posts here are "Physician Heal Thyself" in that I'm just as guilty of blowing it as anyone. I'm learning, too. I can be as good as the next guy in the pew in talking about the Faith while not living it out in a practical way. I hope that people notice that I tend to use the collective "we" when I blog; this is intended to reveal that I'm probably stumbling in my own practice, too, and that I identify with all of us who fall short of the glory of God. This blog serves to challenge my own practice as much as it does anyone else's. If that means that some of the posts here seem a bit too "blanket" in their critiques, it's for this reason.

This has been a year of skyrocketing growth for Cerulean Sanctum. Plenty more people read this blog than they did in January 2005. I hope that 2006 reveals no slackening in the quality of writing, nor in the calling of the Church for the betterment of her practice of the Gospel.

I appreciate every person who reads Cerulean Sanctum. My prayer is that no one leaves here unchallenged. We all have room to grow. Thanks for growing with me.

Hidden Messages of American Christianity: “Family Cocooning Session: No Trespassing Allowed!”

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PadlockThis is the sixth in a series of posts covering the hidden messages that sneak into American churches’ proclamation of the Gospel. For more background, please refer to this post.

We had a single mom of young boys over to our home last Sunday. After enjoying her company and the company of her sons, she confessed that more than anything else she wishes there were a man around in her boys’ lives to give them the masculine influence they need.

This last week, I had an anonymous commenter who lamented that many people have no place to spend Christmas day because of broken families, family located distantly, or similar issues. While I was always fortunate in that regard, I know others who have not been. We should all feel their loneliness and do more than talk about it. (No one in the commenter’s church stepped forward, but unbelievers did. What message does that send?)

At a time when so many of our churches are obsessed with Focus on the Family-like “family” ministry, why are so many so lousy at being a family to the family-less?

It’s hard to escape the message. A quick sampling of church Web sites is enough to show that we’re infatuated with family. Somewhere on the homepage of your average church there’s a JPEG of a smiling family of Mom, Dad, big Bro and little Sis (plus that half child for statistical reasons—the ultrasound’s scheduled for next week.) Given the tenor of today’s church messages, there’s a fair chance you’ll see an ad for the upcoming sermon series on how to have a great sex life—with free earplugs provided for the singles, widowed, and divorced. Thousands of times in a given weekend, churches will be trumpeting the family message, all the while failing to understand what it’s doing to those whose families failed, fell prey to death, or never were.

There’s cocooning and then there’s sin. We may very well be teetering toward the latter. Jesus had this to say about family priorities:

Then Peter said in reply, “See, we have left everything and followed you. What then will we have?” Jesus said to them, “Truly, I say to you, in the new world, when the Son of Man will sit on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name’s sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and the last first.
—Matthew 19:27-30 ESV

And…

Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.
—Matthew 10:37 ESV

What is also not worthy is promoting the family message in our churches while failing to meet true Kingdom family needs. Loving Christ more than anyone else means that our attitudes toward family must become like His. And His look radically different:

While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
—Matthew 12:46-50 ESV

We’re always thinking about the needs of our own biological families, but Jesus turned that on its head. The single mom I referred to above wants nothing more than the time of a man or two to invest in her sons—not tomorrow, not a year from now should she have a proposal from a boyfriend, but right now. (How about taking them to some ballgames or to the movies?) The unmarried man who lives in Burbank while his folks are in Bangor shouldn’t have to sit alone on Christmas. A Christian family should be making certain he spends that day with them (and have a gift for him, too.) Wouldn’t that young single woman in your church who’s from out of town love to have a home-cooked meal at the table of a Christian family willing to make her a part of theirs?

Are we making any of that happen? Or are we cocooning so brilliantly that no one from the outside can penetrate our perfect little shell? (What message does that send our kids about “outsiders”?)

All families are a gift from God, be that physically formed or spiritually created. Despite our obsession with family, our inability to incorporate the less easily incorporated folks into our physical families means that we may not be doing a good job with those spiritual families. Those on the outside looking in hear the ubiquitous family message, but it sounds to them like, “You’re not invited.”

Yeah, I know that there are churches that huddle the guys up to do oil changes and car repairs for single moms. We need more than that, though. While a mechanic may be nice, a surrogate dad for that mom’s kids is even more needed. And if single people embarrass us so much that we have to shove them into their own little groups to do whatever single people do today (nice temptation, huh?), why can’t we do a better job of incorporating them into our families and looking out for prospective mates? In my bachelor days, I knew plenty of singles who would have loved a bit of help with both.

No, the messages we send are hopelessly hypocritical when it comes to family. Too often we treat single moms and dads with an attitude that they’d be better off if they were married. That may very well be, but what are we doing to make that possible? Are we willing to watch their kids while they engage in a real dating life? If we want them to make a good selection in a mate, it may take a year or two. Ask yourself: If I don’t do it, who will? From what I’ve personally witnessed, there’s no line forming, so you may be the only one.

And who’s to say the elderly widow or widower in our churches can’t become another grandma or grandpa to our kids? God knows that my own family would be delighted to have someone filled with sixty years or more of godly living to replace my deceased parents in my own son’s life. His other set of grandparents are 220 miles away. Can any of us have too many God-fearing family members nearby? If you love the Lord and want to be a part of my family, the house is open!

No one said any of this would be easy. It asks something of us, whether we’re blessed with a nuclear family of 4.5 or we’re single, divorced, widowed—whatever. But if we’re not willing to treat like real family those that fall outside the boundaries of what our rule books say is “real family,” then we have no right to talk about the Church being the family of God because we’re not modeling it.

The early Church made a family for the widows and the orphans. Are we doing the same?