Bits O’ Stuff

Various bits of random thoughts:

Halloween is a contentious issue among Christians. I have a new theory that can accurately predict which groups of Christians will be against it and which will be for it.

If the denomination was founded in Europe (Lutheran, Reformed, Presbyterian, Traditional Baptist, etc.), then it is far more likely that adherents will be FOR Halloween, or at least less bothered by it.

However, if the denomination started in the United States (Assemblies of God, Church of God, Pentecostal, Foursquare, Restorationist movement, charismatic non-denominational, etc.), then folks in it are far more likely to be AGAINST Halloween.

That’s my theory and I’m sticking with it!

***

The local Christian radio station, which recently went to a format I call “All Casting Crowns, All the Time,” just fell massively short on their fund drive a couple weeks ago.

First, I have to wonder why Christian radio stations that advertise must also have a fund drive. If they have to pay such exorbitant licensing fees that your advertising receipts can’t cover them, why not dredge up some of the tunes of yesteryear and tell these big Christian record companies (and their painfully bland tunes) to take a hike? Hey, if it’s praise and worship they want, why not some Honeytree, 2nd Chapter of Acts, or a little Don Francisco?

After their fund drive tanked, the local station (which used to have no problem making their fund drive goals when they had more teaching programs–hint, hint), added one more day of fundraising this week and called it “Finish the Work,” supposedly based on 2 Corinthians 8:11.

I don’t know about you, but I thought “finishing the work” was fulfilling the Great Commission, not making sure a Christian radio station playing innocuous, “safe” (i.e. – “limp”) music reached its fundraising goal.

But hey, I’m a rebel anyway.

***

Popular Mechanics recently published a list of 25 skills every man should know:

1. Patch a radiator hose
2. Protect your computer
3. Rescue a boater who has capsized
4. Frame a wall
5. Retouch digital photos
6. Back up a trailer
7. Build a campfire
8. Fix a dead outlet
9. Navigate with a map and compass
10. Use a torque wrench
11. Sharpen a knife
12. Perform CPR
13. Fillet a fish
14. Maneuver a car out of a skid
15. Get a car unstuck
16. Back up data
17. Paint a room
18. Mix concrete
19. Clean a bolt-action rifle
20. Change oil and filter
21. Hook up an HDTV
22. Bleed brakes
23. Paddle a canoe
24. Fix a bike flat
25. Extend your wireless network

Funny thing though: none of those are legacy skills, like being able to pass on historical knowledge or teach a child. No public service skills, either, like being a surrogate dad to a fatherless boy. No relational skills, either. And what about animal husbandry, hunting, or agricultural knowledge? Heck, whatever happened to being able to feed your family without a dependence on the grocery store? I would say that all of those I just mentioned are more worthy. And why the over-reliance on car stuff? Oh well.

***

I predict a bad economy hitting us hard very soon. Why? The quality of job listings at sites like craigslist.com, Monster, and CareerBuilder is way, way down in just the last couple months.

***

It always amuses me that products that advertise that they have less of something (fats, carbs, preservatives, fumes, environmentally-damaging chemicals, etc.) always cost more.

I went through the infamous MTBE era in California. MTBE was supposedly a smog-reducer. Ironically, it’s a byproduct of refining oil. So oil companies take it out in regular gasoline refining. But when California mandated it stay in, the oil companies charged consumers more at the pump to keep it in! Even worse, once it was determined that MTBE caused terrible enviornmental problems of its own, the oil companies charged more on top of what they were charging to leave it in to take it out again!

Urg!

***

I don’t care what anyone says, sugar makes kids hyper.

***

You’ve got to spend a lot more money to eat food that is good for you, but it’s worth it. My son only gets organic milk and meats. I’m noticing more and more kids who are tall/huge for their ages, and I firmly believe it’s due to all the growth hormones in our food supply.

***

The last few weeks on the longer Daylight Savings Time schedule have been disorienting. I keep expecting it to be dark by 6:00 PM.

***

They keep having Godblogcon west of the Rockies, though most of the best Godbloggers I know live in the Midwestern and Southern states. Nashville would seem like the perfect nexus for the Godbloggers I routinely read. Why the obsession with the Far West?

***

I only live about 40 miles from the heart of a large city, but if broadband Internet access is any indication, I might as well live in a black hole!

***

Funny, but also painfully sad and true.

***

If you’re looking for children’s games for Christmas, try something less common. We really enjoy Rat-a-Tat Cat from Gamewright and Gulo Gulo from Rio Grande Games. Adults can play either game enjoyably, too. Few things beat playing a board game with friends and family. Turn off the TV and put away the DVD player, then play a game!

***

Heck, just turn off the TV anyway.

***

Few things beat sitting around a campfire with friends on a cool night, drinking hot cocoa or coffee, roasting up some marshmallows or weenies, and just talking about life.

Why not do that this weekend?

The 800-lb Retail Gorilla’s Comin’ to Town (But Not If I Can Help It!)

Ugh.

Ugh, the sequel.

Did I say “Ugh!” already?

So, why the long face, Dan?

Well, I got home—all bright smiles and chipper—from a wonderful church party only to see the local newspaper trumpeting that Wal-Mart’s coming to town. Three stinkin’ miles straight down from us on our back country road.

Ugh. I could not be more depressed! 🙁

We moved out where we did to get away from all that consumer-driven sprawl and now it’s coming right down the road from us. Goodbye night sky. Sad to see ya go!

Honestly, how far do you have to run to get away from it all? I’m not kidding, this has got me seriously upset.

We already have a big Kroger in a town of 2,800 people. Why do we need a freakin’ Wal-Mart Superstore?

This has got me so mentally fried already that I forgot what I was going to blog about before I heard the news. Argh!

Hey, if anyone out there has successfully fought against Wal-Mart and kept them out, I want to talk with you! I’ve already watched them destroy one rural town I lived in. I won’t let it happen here in this peaceful, laid-back town. E-mail me at the address at top right.

I’ve already got enough things I’m fighting against. Now this. There’s no way I’m going to be able to sleep tonight.

🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁

Update: The Cincinnati Enquirer ran an article this morning saying that efforts are underway to put a $600 million casino complex just to the north of us.

Wonderful. Simply wonderful. 🙁

Ohio voters have consistently voted against casinos in the state, but the pro-casino crowd keeps chipping away at the opposition. The last vote barely kept them out. Another one won’t.

So let’s give everyone underpaying Wal-mart jobs, ship other local jobs to China, then take away what little the Wal-Mart workers make through casinos!

Lovely. Isn’t greed amazing?

***

Update! Please see (and link to this site): No Mount Orab Wal-Mart!

The Loss of Imagination

Ever drive by one of the new breed of churches and think, It’s just a big, ugly box ?

Ever wonder why what passes for Christian art in most Christian bookstores is only a step or two removed from velvet paintings of Elvis?

Ever wonder where the great contemporary Christian literature vanished to?

I think about that last one a lot. As a writer, I struggle with the dearth of avenues for Christian fiction that veers outside the mainstream. I recently wrote a story called “Killing Lilith” that deals with the crushing load of sexual guilt that many men carry. Not only does that story suffer from being brutally frank, but it’s a short story, a form of fiction that lies in a coma in secular realms, and has been dead, buried, and its grave trampled in Christian ones.

If you struggle with fasting, write short fiction for the Christian market. Just be wary of the tendency to starve to death. 😉

I hate to see loss of imagination triumph in the Church. I meet too many Christians who long ago relegated creativity to the devil. It saddens me to no end to encounter dull, lifeless children from Christian homes who have had the imagination beaten out of them, who if asked, “Tell me a story,” can’t dream up one. Somehow we’ve gone overboard in rooting out “vain imaginings” and removing any and all things that stem from our “deceitful hearts,” never questioning whether we have to throw our minds out altogether or if our imaginings and hearts can be redeemed.

So in our purges, I wonder if we’ve left Christianity a shell of what it’s supposed to be.

What should we think when God demands the finest craftsmen for His OT tabernacle and temples? That He asks that the lampstands around His altar be crafted in the likeness of almond branches and their blossoms? Or that He chooses men to write down His inspired words of Truth in a wealth of styles?

I can think of few things more appalling than ugly churches. I mean, if we’re going to spend millions on building a church building (and there’s an ethical question for you), what could be worse than spending all those millions on something that’s ugly as sin, an edifice glorifying mediocrity? Whatever happened to building that building to the glory of God and making it look like something honoring a supreme and majestic Lord?

And why so much bad art in Christian circles? It’s okay if Thelma Lou Posey makes a cross-stitch of the ubiquitous “Footprints” poem and sells it as a church auction, Fridtjof Schroder - 'The Pieta' - 1961 but God forbid if some trained Christian artist creates a challenging oil painting and asks for support.

I wrote a couple weeks ago in my “100 Truths in 30 Years with Christ” post that we need to honor our artists and intellectuals as highly as we do our pastors and preachers. Are we? If we were, what then explains the stifled creativity that inhabits the Christian circle of influence? Why such lowest common denominator art and expression? Shouldn’t we be the ones who foster imagination and the creative spirit?

One of the most underappreciated aspects of us being made in the image of God is that God is a creator at heart. Therefore, so are we.

If we can’t evangelize that truth as much as some of the others we so readily support, we’ll wind up impoverished people. I can’t help but think that if the world saw that Christians led the arts again, they’d be more open to the Gospel.

Yet what would do they think when they encounter a huge multi-million dollar building of cinder block and corrugated metal passing itself off as a church? I know that I don’t immediately think, That’s where life, redemption, and joy happens.

It’s tough to be in the arts and know that few of your tribe value your work enough to pay you to do it. I’m struggling now to know what to do with the short story form, one that I enjoy writing but pays nothing. When I think of God demanding only the finest artisans for His works, I wonder how we got off base.

I wonder.

Update…

Additional links from previous Cerulean Sanctum posts on this issue: